After sobering up and generally regretting last night’s endeavour wholeheartedly I began to ponder over the incident that will inevitably cost more than it cost for the egg to be thrown at my back and came up with a great idea to test how gullible the general population is, but everyone’s going to have to work with me on this one and spread it because I don’t know enough people to spread a conspiracy.
So imagine you’re in charge of a dry cleaning service, and you’re not getting many customers, no-one’s rolling around in the dirt, people only come to you when something unscathed or ruined by a washing machine is soiled, and those pieces of clothing are usually the better taken care of out of someone’s wardrobe.
Imagine you have one to four children that could be classed as either hooligans, or if you’ve met them and are not related to them: twats. Now get these children to hold eggs and their natural reaction will be to throw them at someone…. from a car…. at midnight… okay bear with me I’m experienced in this and it does happen.
So you pay your children very small but tempting prices to do what they do best and piss off a load of people who don’t have a bad word to say about them… except maybe twats, that’s probably considered a bad word. Anyway send them out on to the street, you can drive the car if you want or they can go cruising with their friends, who coincidentally, are also twats; they scout for people wearing coats that need to be dry cleaned and pelt an egg towards them, more money for the family business, they can afford a chinese; except they’ll probably spend their money on cheap cider, because they’re twats.
Now if this becomes a conspiracy not only will we prove that some people will believe anything, but it’ll also be very funny to have people quoting this, going and telling all their friends about the dry cleaner egging scandal, and yes some of those people will inevitably, be twats.