So I just failed my driving test for the third time, and at this point I’m seriously wondering whether there should be a scheme for me to win somebody else’s license for myself, as a much safer driver than most road users I experience day to day. There should be some sort of competition that if you’re a worse driver than someone who has failed their test three times then you should have to give up your license until you drive well enough to earn it back… or something like that.

I’m not saying that the system is inherently flawed (it is, but that’s not the point), just that I reckon there are a lot of people out there, with driving licenses, that are worse than me.

And I should get commended for that.

I hope the DSA is preparing my license now.

Just in case they aren’t however, allow me to make a formal announcement here that I’m going to pass this test even if it kills me, even if it takes thirty years, just to prove to those bastards on the road that I’m half as good as them. Because from my experience, there’s a bloody large percentage of road users who don’t have the first clue about how to apply the highway code, of how to drive, of how to indicate, of where is safe to park, of where the road is, of the fact that cars can kill people.



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