Well I’m back, it’s Saturday afternoon, I woke up a couple of hours ago and I’m going to be leaving you pretty sharpish today, sorry about that but it must be done. Before I pack a bag and head off to worlds unknown for the night however, let me throw something at your face, but not in the literal sense (although sometimes I wish the internet worked that way, it’d certainly be an entertaining way to stop a flame war and it would make Youtube comments so much less infuriating, wait, where was I again?) otherwise I might give you some minor brain damage, and none of us want that (at least I assume that, some people are strange and would probably enjoy it, if you are one of those people I have nothing against you, I just have a problem with giving people brain damage. Wait, I think I’ve gone off topic again, what was I doing? Where am I?). I suppose the NHS would probably cover minor brain damage but I don’t want to go to jail, so if this does somehow (I haven’t quite worked out the mechanism yet but I’m sure I’ll get there eventually) end up in someone receiving grievous bodily harm (GBH for the hipster lawyers out there) I would urge you not to tell anyone it was me who did it, and whatever you do, don’t link your attorneys to this blog post, or they’ll know (and we can’t have that, not if my plan to resurrect the new world order is going to succeed).
You know, after all that it’s not actually that exciting, maybe I’ll save everyone the trouble of getting emergency treatment by just not throwing something at your faces, that would probably work out better for all of us (except for you brain damage fetish people, you’re on your own, pleasure yourself in your own time) especially me.