Why is it that when there’s gorgeous snow all over the place the first instinct of many people is to pick it up and throw it at someone? Is there some in built mechanism within us that makes us want to chuck things around and generally be pricks to each other? Perhaps that’s why monkeys are known for flinging their own feces. In that case we could probably solve that problem in zoos by sticking them in the penguin enclosure for a while. The problem with that plan however, is that you’d need somewhere to keep the penguins while you were letting the monkeys tire themselves out, because something tells me they probably wouldn’t get on too well.
I suppose the alternative instinct is to call the news and demand over-exaggerated reports about how devastating a bit of winter weather is. I’m sure by now everyone knows what snow is and what it’s likely to do, just tell us if we’re going to be able to go about our days as normal and stop shouting about how the UK is stuck in some kind of frosty apocalypse.